Ma Cherié

Cherié Photos Model Me

I woke this morning and I didn’t know who I was,

I was a stranger to myself.

 

I couldn’t remember the previous night,

I didn’t think I wanted to,

Nor did I care.

 

I tried to see inside my mind,

But what I saw frightened me.

I felt inside my soul but,

It seemed empty.

 

Where was I,
and what have I become?

 

I realized,

I had lost myself somewhere,

In the back alleys of Brooklyn.

 

Then I saw it,

It frightened me but,

This is my trip from my own reality,

To the depths of hell.

 

Cherie Maddison

Cherié dark poetry

Time can never heal these scars,

Tears can never heal this pain,

And words can never erase these memories.

 

You’re apologies mean nothing,

You’re gifts are simple tokens,

Showing how much you wish you can take it all back.

 

Time has come,

For you to open you’re eyes,

See how much you’re dreams have cost me.

 

Now I ask you,

Was it worth it?

Did you enjoy it?

 

Look at me,

Look into these shattered eyes,

Look at this washed away black make up,

If that isn’t enough,

Look at these scars!

 

Was it worth it?

 

Search for my soul,

You won’t find it,

I’ll never find it!

 

Because of you,

I have cried,

I have mourned,

I have bled.

 

I’m not here to help you,

I’m not here to save you,

I’m not here to say I forgive you,

Nor to say I love you.

Was it worth it?

 

I’m here for my revenge,

To shatter you’re eyes,

To burn you’re soul,

To say I hate you!

 

Was it worth it?

 

 

 

Cherié Maddison                                                       2008

Cherié dark poetry

When the world seems ruthless,

You search for mercy.

 

When the light seems to blinding,

You run to you’re safety.

 

When the darkness has fed too much evil,

You run in search of freedom.

 

And when you alone,

Glaring in you’re reflection,

You realize,

Those eyes you see are yours.

 

It’s time to see,

You can run no further,

You need to face them,

Accept you’re victory’s,

As well as you’re losses.

 

Theirs nowhere to run!

 

Cherié Maddison

Cherié dark poetry

The memories you never knew I had,

Always thought I was too young to understand.

I saw what you did.

I remember everything,

And it tears me apart each day.

 

What you did is unforgivable.

I wonder where I would have been,

Without knowing you.

 

I believe in family,

But, you ruined that,

The day you raised you’re hand.

 

You go on,

Day by day,

Ignoring what you’ve done,

Never thinking of the pain you caused.

 

You numb you’re memories,

With you’re alcohol,

But, you shout at me,

For numbing mine with drugs.

 

One day,

It will surely all come back to you.

And I hope by then,

You’ll know what to do,

And realize the pain you caused,

Made me feel so lost,

Never knew where I belonged.

I was always searching for you!

 

Now I know who I am,

Without needing you,

The pain you brought me,

I cannot comprehend.

 

Cherié Maddison                                                                         17 March 2008

Cherié dark poetry

You brought me back,

 and took me to wonderland.

Where the instructions were easy,

rules, not hard to follow.

 

The days spent there was all in summer glory.

It’s the happiest we have both ever been.

 

When I think upon those,

I remember clearly.

The sun shined,

the birds sang.

The sky was the most blue,

I’ve ever seen.

It’s beauty,

blinding.

 

It’s as if all the higher powers,

wanted to see how we could glow,

how we laughed,

and how we tampered,

with all the magic.

Only to bring a better purpose for this life.

 

Until she found us,

and  made our wonderland,

 get taken away.

 

 

Now we both lye in our beds,

Dreaming of what once was.

 

We’re back in this world,

full of gloom,

and darkness.

 

Here there is no light that shines,

other than the police sirens,

and the street lights,

giving a home,

                                to kids with parents,

that are addicted to all kinds of,

meths.

 

Brown paper bags,

which their assets of what they see life as,

remains.

Their burned teaspoons are for sale,

just so they can buy their fresh hit.

Some are even selling their kids.

 

Yet this is not their fault,

it’s this world of darkness,

that brings all this carnage and hate.

 

Set them free to wonderland,

and they’ll never be the same.

 

Cherie Maddison

Cherié dark poetry

I want you’re blood around my neck,

To treasure,

To hold,

To always keep closest to my heart.

 

And when the rain storms, and the lightning strikes,

I’ll always be with you,

And you with me.

 

I’ll protect you from the pain this world has created.

When the world comes to an end,

When all is at war,

 And the sky falls down,

And our tears fall as blood,

As our hearts silently scream,

Slowly bleeds I’ll hold you close,

 

And when all is failing,

And we loose the hope to hold onto what we believe,

I’ll hold you really close

And close your eyes,

Telling you of our vampire gothic dreams,

Of what we wish for

For life,

For love,

For pain to disappear.

 

We’ll escape into the exact place we dream to be.

When you feel alone,

 I want you to think of me

 And know I would die or live for you,

 As long as you stay by my side.

 

 

Our eyes may bleed blood and our world may die,

But, I’ll always be their with you,

Right by you’re side,

Ready to catch you when you fall

 

I want you’re blood around my neck!

 

 Cherié Maddison                                                              2009 April 19

Cherié dark poetry

People have always told me,

“Everything will be o.k.”

I never believed them.

 

Then they slowly started to fool me,

Until I believed their false words.         

 

Now they turn around,

With apologetic smiles,

They throwing everything back in my face.

 

What once had made me believe,

Now proves me wrong.

Now I know for certain,

 

Nothing will ever be O.K!

 

 

 

Cherié Maddison                                                                                 August 2008

Cherié dark poetry

I’m loosing all hope again,

I’m loosing my pulse and will to keep breathing.

I wan to slit my fucking pain out my veins,

Eat as much glass as it takes, for me to puke my heart out!

All I want is to escape,

To die!

 

I got nothing to live for,

I’ve lost every-one before,

And so I will once again.

I don’t know why I always think that this one will last forever.

I’ve learned my lesson well,

That they never do!

 

Why must I always get hope,

Again and again.

The hope always comes crashing down,

Like a lightning,

Striking me back into my pain!

 

Where’s the hope coming from?

I want to destroy the source,

And die!!!

 

I want to loose all hope, and never have to try again!!!

 

Cherié Maddison

Cherié dark poetry

The feeling that I don’t belong,

The feeling of you’re cold body,

Draining everything out of mine,

Using me!

You making me want to die!

You do everything, you know will kill me,

When you see the blood pouring,

 You begin to beg WHY?

I swear you want me to be left with nothing!

 

You want to target my weaknesses,

And the people that care,

Just so you can take me down and out!

You killing me slowly,

You stabbing me to deep.

 

You chose him,

I don’t care if you know hate him,

I have the choice to love him!

And I will stand my ground.

 

You killing me silently,

You killing me slowly!

 

Cherié Maddison

Cherié dark poetry